Sunday, June 19, 2011

" Celibacy or Bust "

And if I were to marry the fat end of a Sharpie to the interior of a flattened cardboard box, if I were to create a protest poster for this strike I'm about to embark, it would read:

" Celibacy or Bust "

But, I won't.

Not because I don't enjoy the theatrical approach of creating overstated opinions - whether rurally announced upon what once was a box, or boorishly denounced from the stage of a soap box - certainly, I do. But, these words I will not combine to communicate my stance.

Mostly, well entirely, because I fear the implication. "Celibacy or Bust" might lead one's mind far, far astray. I am, I am certainly, as of today, as of right this moment, engaging a monk-like approach to the opposite gender - but I dare not insinuate a Priest-like approach to the same gender. I'm no longer in pursuit of what Adam gave Eve... neither am I in pursuit of the apples she provided him, from beneath her leaf brassiere.

On second thought, my poster, should I create one, will simply read:

" Celibacy. "

Triumphantly, I will cap the Sharpie. There.


And, with an ink-dipped needle point of a safety pin, I will provide honesty in the only place it is found; in the finest of fine print, I will scribble my one-word disclaimer, "lie."

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